Dealing With Your Anger*
Carl H. Shubs, Ph.D. © 2004
People often have difficulty either accepting their anger or expressing it in ways that are appropriate to the situation. Some questions to ask yourself can help you to learn more about your anger and your relationship with it.
1) How has your anger been a liability to you and/or your loved ones?
2) When in you life was your anger an asset? What can you remember about those times and situations?
3) What has been the most profound physical cost of your anger?
4) What has been the most profound emotional cost of your anger?
5) When in your life has your anger destroyed an interpersonal relationship? What happened? Why?
6) Who in your past or present does your anger most remind you of?
7) When your anger is better, who will be the first person to notice?
8) If your anger does not change, what do you suppose will happen?
9) In the past, how have you had success controlling your anger or keeping it at bay?
10) Describe in as much detail as possible what your life will be life once your anger is more in control.
These questions can enable you to gain a clearer understanding or your use of anger as a coping and/or defense mechanism.
* Adapted from “Treating Anger in Therapy,” by Joseph B. Worth, Ph.D., Family Therapy magazine, September/October, 2004, pp. 40-42.
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